My wife and I have just returned from our first trip of the year. It is August. Our holiday was spent within the United Kingdom. This would have been unthinkable a year ago when I was busy making travel plans for 2020! Unfortunately, the current pandemic put a halt to any aspiration of visiting exotic shores. Holidays to Singapore, Bali and Florence had to be cancelled. I am pleased to report, however, that we had a wonderful time in the North of England.

Global events forced us to abandon plans to visit other countries, but this has encouraged us to embrace the concept of the ‘staycation.’ Whilst it is naturally more exciting to imagine exploring foreign lands, it is nice to see people taking the time to appreciate the beauty of their home nation.

I must admit that I was not as excited as I would have been if we were about to travel to the Mediterranean or the Caribbean. I checked the weather forecast before Carol and I set off, in the hope that we would at least be blessed with some sunshine. It stated that it would rain every day. Of course.

It only took us an hour to reach Waterside Lodge, which is adjacent to the South Lakeland Leisure Village in Carnforth. The lodge belongs to Carol’s cousins, so I felt additional pressure to ensure that I did not cause any damage to the property whilst unloading the car. The only mishap occurred when I dropped a bag on Carol’s toe, which resulted in a hard stare from my unfortunate wife!

The weather was unexpectedly pleasant. The sun was shining, and it was relatively warm. We began our staycation by consuming our own body weight in cheese and wine.

“This is perfect. We are sat on the decking, contently eating and drinking whilst watching the ducks splash about in the water. We must be really lucky, as the sun is shining,” I said with an air of smugness, perhaps tempting fate.

The rain almost immediately began to pour down.

Carol was not too disheartened: “It doesn’t matter. I have already taken lots of pictures with bright blue sky and glorious sunshine. I can send Snapchats to all my friends and make them jealous!”

Although we were listening to the rain bouncing down on the roof of the lodge, Carol sent a plethora of pictures to her friends and posted several images on social media which gave the impression that we were enjoying a sun-kissed break whilst our friends toiled in work.

The rain finally relented after a couple of hours, which prompted us to dash to the hot tub that was located on the decking area. This reminded me of an observation made by an Australian stand-up comedian a few years ago; people in his homeland can plan a barbeque weeks in advance, but the weather is so unpredictable here that British people have to phone their friends and ask them to come around immediately if the sun is shining! Similarly, we had to make the most of this window of opportunity.

I was in such a rush that I dropped the hot tub cover on Carol’s foot. This was followed by an even sterner stare than I had received earlier. All was soon forgiven, as we relaxed in the hot tub. Bliss. It appeared that some spiders were interested in joining us. One of them was in a web hanging from the roof of the lodge. We held our breath every time that there was a gust of wind, as it looked like the spider would be catapulted into the hot tub! I began to edge over to the side that was the furthest distance from the precariously positioned arachnid. I love Carol dearly, but I was prepared to use her as a human shield if it came to it!

Our dinner reservation at the Waters Edge restaurant within South Lakeland Leisure Village represented our first time ‘eating out’ since the United Kingdom went into lockdown in March. We were a little unsure of what to expect, but it turned out to be a pleasant evening. The restaurant was not crowded, the tables were kept a safe distance apart, and there was plenty of hand-sanitiser available. The fact that the staff were wearing face coverings was the biggest indication that we were experiencing the ‘new normal.’ One thing that had not changed was the inevitability of ordering far too much food! My double steak burger, chips and onion rings was more than enough to satisfy my hunger, but that did not stop me from making myself feel sick by ordering dessert!

Our time in the lodge allowed us to indulge in one of life’s great pleasures; I find that there are not many activities as enjoyable as reading a good book. Our hectic and tiring lives have resulted in most of us abandoning this in favour of watching television in the evening. The quiet location of the lodge provided the perfect opportunity to take some time to lose ourselves in the pages of a book. I found Simon Reeve’s Step by Step to be fascinating, but Carol could barely keep her eyes open whilst she attempted to read my debut effort, The Adventures of an Introvert. I hope that this was because she was tired rather than an indicator of the level of interest that she held in my book!

We decided to visit the nearby villages of Arnside and Silverdale during our first full day of our staycation. Both were within a fifteen-minute drive from the lodge, but we were relying on our Sat-Nav to guide the way. This should not have been a problem; after all, that is the sole purpose of the device. However, our Sat-Nav seemed determined to take us along the most illogical and complicated route possible.

We drove right past a sign that indicated that Arnside could be reached by turning left down a main road, only for our Sat-Nav to direct us down the next left, which turned out to be a narrow country lane that was barely wide enough to accommodate a single car. It must have wanted to ensure that we were given the true British holiday experience of driving along country lanes whilst fearing a lorry would appear out of nowhere and ram straight into us. It was the type of scene that is often featured in movies in which American characters are exposed to these old country lanes for the first time. This usually ends up with a cyclist being run off the road in comedic fashion, before striking up a relationship with the driver responsible for their accident. Thankfully, no cyclists were injured during our drive to Arnside.

The weather had been miserable all morning, but it had stopped raining by the time that we had arrived in Arnside. It was still dull and cloudy, but at least we were dry. The area is known for its fast-rising tides and its delicious fish and chips. We enjoyed a different British tradition for lunch, as we had brought packed lunches consisting of ham sandwiches and crisps. We had been so starved of holidays that we immediately began taking photographs of everything that we encountered. It did not matter whether it was an ordinary-looking pub or a regular row of shops, we made sure that we captured an image of it. One of the more significant sights was the Arnside Viaduct, which has a history dating back to the mid-nineteenth century. I snapped away as a train crossed the viaduct and continued its picturesque journey along the other side of Morecombe Bay.

We decided against walking up to the summit of Arnside Knott, as the clouds appeared increasingly gloomy, and we were unsure of how the usually fine view overlooking the estuary of the River Kent would look in these conditions. Instead, we headed towards Silverdale. We were once again at the mercy of our Sat-Nav, which took us along another bewildering route to our destination.

We found a car park that was a mile outside of the centre of the village. It was the starting place for a walk through some woodland. We took a few steps along the muddy ground before deciding that it was a bad idea and returned to our car. After locating the village, we were unable to find anywhere to park. The rain had started to pick up again by this point, and our enthusiasm to spend any more time exploring this ‘Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty’ was already on the wane, so we ended up driving back to the lodge. I spent an hour reading before dinner, whereas Carol had a nap whilst clutching my book.

The weather forecast for the following day indicated that we would be afforded sunshine until mid-afternoon. After breakfast, we headed for Grange-over-Sands on the other side of Morecombe Bay. We began by walking along the famous promenade, whilst keeping our distance from passers-by. Social distancing guidelines were the main reason for this, although my instinct to avoid other human beings has long been in place!

Having spent a couple of hours admiring the promenade and the public gardens, we wandered through the village until we saw an enticing café. This provided the opportunity to sample another British tradition; we ordered a pot of tea and some scones that were served with homemade jam. Ignoring the fact that tea was imported from Asia, this seemed to enhance the ‘Britishness’ of our staycation. The scones were delightful, but the feeling of missing out on visiting the nearby Lake District was nagging away at me. I had seen a few signs that indicated that Windermere was only fifteen miles from our current location. It just seemed a shame not to see any of the Lake District whilst we were in this part of the country.

“I would really like to see a lake today. Is it OK if we visit Windermere?” I asked Carol.

“Yes, I am happy to drive us there,” she replied.

This rather rushed decision meant that we had not taken the time to consider how busy Windermere would be. It was an afternoon during the summer holidays, at a time when more people were deciding to stay in Great Britain rather than flying to another country for a vacation.

Our act of sheer folly became apparent as we approached Bowness-on-Windermere. We had been lulled into a false sense of security during our trips to Arnside and Grange-over-Sands, but we now found ourselves in a place that was being completely overrun by tourists. We had seen scenes like this on television in recent weeks and we had scoffed at the foolishness of those that had travelled to such places. The pavements were full of pedestrians and the roads were jam-packed with cars. We were heading in the same direction as everyone else, desperately hoping to find a parking space.

We drove for miles, occasionally stopping to search in vain for somewhere to park. It seemed like this was a hopeless task, but as we had travelled this far, we were determined to at least pay a fleeting visit to the lake. We thought that we had found a car park with a few available spaces, only to realise that people were just double-parking and blocking other vehicles in. One woman was angrily telling drivers what was happening.

In other places, cars had been parked on pavements and grass embankments. It was total chaos! Carol spotted a free space in one car park, only to be pipped to the prize by another smug-looking driver. Undeterred, we eventually came across a large car park belonging to an adventure park which had lots of available spaces. Although we had no interest in going on a zipwire or taking part in archery sessions, it was located by Lake Windermere. We parked up, avoided the activity stands and walked towards the lake.

Only the tiniest slither of lakeside land was accessible to the public, but this was enough for me. We were able to admire the lake and take some photographs. At least our excursion to Windermere had not been a complete disaster. We had seen other sections of the lake during our drive and we had also briefly stopped at a secluded spot which provided access to another tiny area of land by the water. It was far from ideal, but it was just about enough to satisfy my desire to see some of the Lake District.

We spent a couple of hours at Lakeland Wildlife Oasis after checking out of our accommodation the following morning. It was a small place which housed a variety of animals, insects and fish. We paid an extra fee to feed the meerkats, which was the highlight of our visit. Our guide provided us with some interesting information about meerkats, as well as underlining how they attract a high volume of customers, which in turn helps the zoo to pay for the upkeep of the other animals. I had assumed that people tend to exaggerate the extent to which these animals from southern Africa stand on their hind legs, but I was pleased to see that they actually do this regularly. They seemed to be observing their surroundings in the manner of an inquisitive neighbour who has heard the occupants of the house next door arguing on their drive. The only disappointment was that no matter how much food we gave them, they did not offer us any cheap insurance!

Overall, our staycation exceeded my expectation. We had visited areas of genuine natural beauty, we had been impressed by our accommodation, and we had thoroughly enjoyed the change of scenery. Being stuck indoors for months had increased my appreciation of the experience of travelling to new places, regardless of the location. The patchy weather and the odd mishap along the way just added to the charm of our British staycation. The only downside was the number of people in Windermere. It would have been perfect if they could have just left the area free for Carol and me to explore on our own! Our decision to go on a staycation had been vindicated; the only problem with a good idea is that it is likely that lots of other people have made the same choice.